KROQ is my favorite station in LA by far, and the Kevin and Bean show is one of my all time favorite morning shows. It’s always a good time, and I’ve got a lot of nutty **** to talk about tomorrow. I’ll be on at 7am. Jihad to you all. http://www.kroq.com/
I’ll have some new blogs up for you freaks soon. I’ve had a lot of crazy **** happen over the past few weeks. Much to talk about, but not a whole lot of time right now unfortunately. This Friday night I’ll be at the Hollywood, CA improv for 2 shows at 8 and 10 with Joey Diaz and Ari Shaffir. Come on down and join the party! http://www.symfonee.com/improv/hollywood/comedians/Bio.aspx?Uid=acd01ce6-c910-4e94-8297-0f0157214151
I’m performing at the Comedy Works in Denver tonight, Friday and Saturday with my good pal Ari Shaffir. If you’re in the area, come on down! We’re gonna talk pot, conspiracy theories, volcanoes, gay marriage, you name it! As usual, I’ll also have a Question and Answer period after the show where we can shoot the **** about whatever you like. I’ve been writing a **** load lately, but most of it for a book I’m working on. I’ll try to get some blogs up next week though. http://www.comedyworks.com/
I’ll be taking over KBPI’s radio show in Denver tomorrow morning, Tuesday 9-29-09 from 7:30am to 10:30am. In Denver it’s 106.7 and if you’re not here in God’s country you can listen to it online at http://www.kbpi.com/main.html You can call in at 303-713-7625 or 303-713-7655 the last 4 digits of each phone number are “ROCK” and “ROLL” How cute. And how ******* annoying if you’re trying to call them from a blackberry and you have to figure out what the **** those letters represent in numbers. I actually had to ask to borrow someone’s phone once just to read the letters on the numbers. I really wish people would stop that goofy practice. Just give me the ******* number, please. Anyway, call up, I’ll take as many calls as I can in between the songs that they have to play. It’s always a good time on that station, and now that I’m living in Colorado I’m sure I’ll be on more often.
I got an incredible amount of responses to my last blog, so many and so varied that I thought I should probably address a few. The vast majority of the people agreed with what I had to say, and applauded my stand against some of the more ridiculous trends infecting our beloved sport, but curiously quite a few folks felt I was unjustly “bashing” MMA fans, and a couple even arrived at the misguided opinion that by poking fun at some of the silly behavior and moronic wardrobe choices I was somehow “biting the hand that feeds me.” To that I say, first and foremost I’m a stand up comic. I make fun of everything, including myself. When you get upset at something I say that reflects on you, just think about the **** I say about me. I regularly describe myself as a short, balding, little chimp-man. I drank my own piss and put the video of it up on youtube. Not only do I regularly wear a fanny pack – the most widely ridiculed wardrobe item the world has ever known – but I’m at the helm of an ill-conceived campaign actively trying to bring them back to popularity. I’m a goof. But guess what, **** face – so are you. We all are. It comes with the territory of being a human being; we are innately goofy, odd little talking monkeys spinning around on this giant rock that’s flying through the infinite vastness of the universe. The biggest and saddest goofs amongst us by FAR, however, are the ones that get angry when you make fun of them. The bottom line in this life, is do whatever the **** you want to do as long as it’s not harming anyone else. Happiness is precious and there is no universal method of achieving it. If it really brings you joy, and you’re not hurting anyone else, **** what some dummy like me has to say. When you’re taking a picture standing next to Vitor Belfort put TWO fists up, just for spite. Right before the flash goes off, pull your pants down too. He’s a nice guy, he probably won’t say ****. Does that “Tap or Snap – the choice is yours!” T-shirt really appeal to you? If it does, rock that **** homey. What, are you gonna live forever? **** it – after you get that bitch home, head on down to your local “Hot Topic” and get yourself some glue and glitter, and pimp that ************ up proper. Put a big, red, glittery dick on the front and wear it around the mall with your chest puffed out. If it puts a smile on your face, that’s really all that matters. To all you silly ***** out there that were actually upset at anything I said, my recommendation to you, is to get yourself a joint and a telescope. Take a couple hits, look through that lens, and even if it’s just for a brief moment try to get yourself a different perspective. You’ll thank me later. I wasn’t planning to write this blog entry, and in the end I didn’t actually have that much to say, but I’m trying to really update this thing more often. I’m sitting in a hotel room right now, and I’ve got to get some sleep. I’ve been working on a movie for the last couple weeks in Boston, and after long days on the set I’ve got to force myself to bang something out on the keyboard.
